You remember that song “All you need is Love” ???
What if I was to tell you that there is a good chance that Love might actually be hurting you in the bedroom?
Don’t believe it? Well read on and I’ll show you how:
It’s no secret that there is nothing like REAL PASSION to make for an amazing night of sex. Remember your first few sexual experiences when neither of you knew what you were doing, but you couldn’t keep your hands off each other? Still makes you tingle just thinking about it.
So lets fast forward a little bit for all the couples out there. You meet a great person. You click. Everything is great, the sex … AMAZING. Remember how you used to just throw her on the bed and ravish her?
Then your relationship moved forward, you become more in-tune with each other (more relaxed). The “honey-moon” period is gone now and you realize that it’s love knocking on your door at last.
What happens then? – For many relationships, the passion seems to slowly wither.
Instead of throwing her down on the kitchen table and ravishing her, you start saying things like, “I’m sorry honey, did you just hit your elbow? Did you bump your head? Are you OK? “
I’ve done it. I would wager you’ve done it. We ALL do it.
I’m not saying that you shouldn’t ask if you think you might have done some serious damage… I’m saying that men (and women) become OVER attentive (over loving) in the bedroom, leading to the demise of passion. Think about it, if you were in the throws of passion, would you even notice some small inconvenience??
The definition of sexual passion is being THERE, in the moment, COMPLETELY.
I read somewhere that when it comes to sex and passion there is a gigantic difference between being 99% there (in the moment) with your partner and 100% there. Its a profound statement.
And no, I’m not Anti-Love. You should make a lot of time for (soft, gentle) romantic kissing/touching/sex… It just shouldn’t be the only thing on the menu.
Now that you’re aware of the issue, there’s no reason to let love ruin your sex life!
The solution is simply awareness. If you catch yourself being over attentive, or over loving at the wrong time, simply realize what you’re doing and stop. Even if it takes a bit of practice, it’s well worth the conscious effort.
Relationships take work, and so does great sex!